Belles
by Shalwol5
Summary: it's Spencer's wedding day and everything looks perfect, everyone looks happy, or it seems so
1. Chapter 1

Secrets are always the poison in any relationship, no matter how few or small they were they'll always come around to haunt you, to torture you, parting ways with people makes those secrets bigger, scarier, and all the more destructive.

It was the weekend of their wedding, everyone was staying in the cramped up church they rented for the wedding, Spencer never thought that anyone but her four friends would show up, she wasn't sure if they would show up either, since she traveled away after the A fiesta to DC to continue her studies as a lawyer she hasn't looked back that much, she still talked to the girls from time to time though.  
To her knowledge Hanna and Caleb had a little kid named Iris, she remembers the tiny blue eyed Caleb mini version because she got to spend the first 5 months of her life with her.  
As for Emily and Alison, they were supposed to have their wedding before hers but they suddenly changed their minds without giving anyone a reason why.  
Aria and Ezra were planning an adoption but she doesn't know how that went.  
Finally her family, both her siblings Jason and Melissa were outside the states doing God knows what, Charlotte was released from Welby and hasn't been a problem to any of them since then, even when the uber A shit went down she had nothing to do whit it, she just stayed home studying and taking her meds Alison made sure of that, but she sent everyone an invitation anyway.

Alex on the other hand was off the radar both her and Mary, Mona was off the radar too until she reached out to her asking if they could meet in privet, things went all over the place since then and she vaguely remembers inviting her with a plus one to her wedding.

Toby had invited some of his own friends from work and school, but she never thought it'll get crowded or she would've rented a bigger church.  
Both her parents were there, she wasn't surprised when her dad brought a date with him, he'd been on a women spree since the divorce, which just made her even madder because how dare he, he did that to them himself, cheating and lying a thousand times to them, he shouldn't get to be happy with anyone.  
Even though her mother said that she was okay after the divorce and that it was for the best and that it should've happened a long time ago, Spencer could clearly see through her mother's bullshit, she was breaking apart barely holding on, no matter how much of an ass her dad was she knew that Veronica loved him, she never knew why really but she knew that she did.

Even Kenneth DiLaurentis showed up for some reason, she didn't even want to know why, she hated the man and his fucked up behavior with everyone around him but she was way too stressed and way too worried about the possibility of her wedding going down in flames to care.  
The wedding was in 2 days and she still had no word on the flowers or the cake! She was freaking out, and when Spencer Hastings freaks out everything around her turns into chaos.

* * *

Toby was sitting down on the couch outside his shared bedroom with Caleb, his head in his hands having the most painful headache he had since he tried understanding what went down with Alex Drake five years ago.  
Hanna insisted that Toby and Spencer sleep in separate bedrooms until the wedding because it was bad luck or something he wasn't really listening.  
She just pushed her husband towards him, and pulled Spencer away, it was amusing at first but now he really needed his fiancé with him, he thought about calling her but knowing Spencer shed be mad at him if he called regarding anything but an emergency.  
It was his wedding day too, he wanted reassurance, his roommate got married while fighting a psychopathic cyber bully without a second thought, and he really didn't want to think that his hesitation and freak-out is because he loves Spencer any less than Caleb loves Hanna, but he was starting to doubt everything right now, and having the love of his life with him at this moment was his best option, and he _knew_ how selfish that sounded, he saw how freaked out Spencer was about everything, and he put his brave, clam face on for her, but it's starting to crack.

Just when he was about to say 'fuck it' and go talk to Spencer he saw the second best person he could seek comfort from after his wife to be, Emily Fields, his best friend, first girlfriend and she really gives incredible advice, she was walking down the hall, desperately trying to call someone.

"Em!" he ran up to her cutting whatever attempt she was having to call whoever it was for the fifth time.  
"Toby, hey" she seemed surprised and a bit flustered "what are you doing here? Aren't you like supposed to be down at the bar?" tilting her head adorably, defiantly a trait she picked up from Alison.  
"Yeah, I just kinda got overwhelmed, I really need to talk to you Em" he said hurriedly like he was scared he'd get caught or something, furrowing her eyebrows in confusion she said "yeah sure what's going on?"  
"I know I'm not usually this guy, actually I'm never this guy unless I was in front of Spencer.."  
"Toby what's going on?"

"I'm scared Em, I know I should be the brave party in all of this and show her that everything would be ok but I can't, I'm freaking out Emily and I can't tell her that or she'll freak-out even more hence a super freaked Spencer which is way worse than no caffeine Spencer believe me"  
"all right calm down, first of all you don't have to be brave you're a detective that's enough bravery for a life time" she nudged him with a small chuckle "and you're right freaked-out Spencer is a nightmare, I'm glad you came to me honestly I needed the distraction anyway"

"Why what's going on?" his burrows furrowed instantly with an exaggerated serious tone he said "do you need me to arrest anyone?"  
"Well if you can arrest my future father in law for being a pain in the ass that'll be great" the brunette sighed with a hopeful smile  
"believe me if I could I would've done it that first night he bailed on Ali, she might not be my favorite person but no one bails on their kid like that, I've been through it and it's ugly"  
"Your mother never bailed on you Toby you know that"  
"I wasn't talking about her... Anyway what did the dirt bag do now?"  
"well he came to the wedding uninvited and he's harassing my fiancé about getting an abortion like he even cares" Emily hated Kenneth that's for sure, every time she mentioned him she had a disgusted look on her face as if she smelled something nasty, and Toby couldn't blame her, that man was despicable.

"You want me to get rid of him for you?" his voice was both sympathetic and protective at the same time, it was impressive really.  
"I really didn't want to bother you or Spencer on your wedding weekend, it's fine Tobes I was just calling the court to see if I can file a restarting order sooner than later before you saw me, just relax I've got it under control" he smiled fondly at his best friend, it was so Emily like to take every problem under her own hand without letting anyone help her, she was _always_ self-dependent, since the very first day he met her, something's never change.  
"I know you do, but I want to get rid of him too, so I'm helping whether you like it or not, ok neighbor?" he fixated her with a halfhearted stern look, until she laughed and agreed.  
"Fine, but I get to do the insulting"  
"You got that" he chuckled, leave it to Emily Fields to cheer him by giving him something else to do.


	2. Chapter 2

p class="MsoNormal"She walked in with a long designer coat her sunglasses pushed up in her brown short hair, her expensive perfume filing the church's reception hall, Melissa Hastings was as enchanting as ever. Right behind her grunting with frustration and a jumble of blond hair that still looks perfect and untouched even with the heavy luggage she's pulling in with her, Charlotte walked up to her fiancé and huffed in annoyance, like always Melissa walked in and left her with all the heavy duty, she can't be mad at her though, Melissa makes it up to her in every other way possible, literally./p  
p class="MsoNormal"The brunette gives her a tiny peck on her lips with a small smirk once Charlotte stands next to her muttering a quite 'hey babe'./p  
p class="MsoNormal"Charlotte rolls her eyes fondly with fake annoyance "I hate you sometimes" she huffs/p  
p class="MsoNormal""Sure you do" Mellissa's smirk widens as she finishes the paper work with the front desk worker./p  
p class="MsoNormal""Two keys please" Melissa returns the single key he gave her signaling the young boy to give her another one. The boy looks at her funny and makes some snarky comment under his breath about lesbians taking over. Melissa tries to ignore him because it's her younger sister wedding weekend and she really wants to spend the first two days shackled up in bed with her fiancé instead of getting into petty fights with ignorant assholes./p  
p class="MsoNormal"But apparently Charlotte has other ideas, as she dangerously approaches the man behind the desk giving him a death stare that Melissa has only witnessed twice, none of were directed at her, thank God./p  
p class="MsoNormal""what did you just say" Charlotte growls, her voice low and if Melissa was being honest a bit terrifying, which did not help with her libido she was beyond turned on at this point, scared and wants to break this fight apart, but turned on nothing less./p  
p class="MsoNormal""babe" she says softly, lightly touching the golden haired woman's arm, she really just wants to go up to their bedroom, there's also the part where no one but Veronica knows about her and Charlotte and she definitely didn't plan on telling them like this./p  
p class="MsoNormal"But Charlotte doesn't budge, she set her mind on putting this prick in his place and as sexy as it was, Melissa knew how worked up and how sensitive Charlotte actually is to those assholes, she hates how much what they say affects her, and she wants to kill every single one of them that has ever upset her girl, but right now is just not the right time./p  
p class="MsoNormal"Thankfully though the boy doesn't answer he just pushes the two keys in Melissa's direction and walks away without making eye contact with her furious fiancé, smart Melissa thinks./p  
p class="MsoNormal"" I hate those disgusting straight assholes" Charlotte growls turning to face Melissa, her eyebrows furrowed and Melissa swears she can see actual steam coming out of her head./p  
p class="MsoNormal"Melissa couldn't help but smile lovingly at the girl in front of her, when they first met, Melissa was just a six year old girl that wanted to pick up apples with her parents, and Charlotte was Charlie, the most charming, most captivating seven year old little boy Melissa has ever met in her whole life, they kept meeting up on different occasions like a fairytale dream, her secret knight that kept showing up out of nowhere./p  
p class="MsoNormal"span style="mso-spacerun: yes;" /spanMelissa has never believed in love at first sight until she fell for the blonde in front of her, little Charlie was so feminine and soft, she loved it. She remembers the day Charlie finally confessed to her that he felt like a she, that his insides never matched his outsides, she remembers him telling her about his dad Kenneth and how much he hated him for wanting to be a girl, she remembers how much she herself hated Kenneth back then, and even now, she remembers how excited and happy she was for the girl she loved and deep down knew was trapped in Charlie's body to come out, she remembers how her reaction made Charlotte cry with happiness and hug her tight whispering a quite ' thank you' into her ear, she remembers the shiver that ran up her spine at that moment, she remembers falling in love. Because ever since that day, nothing Charlotte ever said or have done could shake that feeling away, even when she found out that she was the infamous A her feelings remained as strong as ever, increasing with every second./p  
p class="MsoNormal"So she stepped forwards grabbing her fiancé's hands between her own softly, she leaned into her blonde lover and kissed her slowly pouring all her unsaid emotions in that single kiss./p  
p class="MsoNormal"" I love you" she murmured against Charlotte's lips, when Melissa finally backed away her fiancé was standing there eyes still closed a dumfounded look on her face, she looked beautifully adorable and the brunette never thought she'd fall more in love with her golden haired beauty, but in that moment she did./p  
p class="MsoNormal""What was that for?" Charlotte whispered, transfixed by the woman in front of her, momentarily forgetting to say 'I love you' back. "Because I felt like it" Melissa shrugged moving closer to the blonde "now take me up to our room because what just happened turned me on big time" she said in Charlotte's ear, her tone sultry and low. Charlotte gulped loudly her throat instantly going dry, her anger long gone and all she could think off was ripping that coat off of her fiancé and devouring her whole./p  
p class="MsoNormal"When she first told Melissa about being locked up in a mental institution when they were just ten years old, she was sure the girl would run away, but Melissa stuck around and kept playing with dolls like what she just told her was the most normal thing a ten year old would hear their friend say. They met coincidentally always, never having a normal steady friendship, so they either meet when Charlotte would sneak out of the Radley or when Peter Hastings would go visiting her mother Jessica to check up on Jason, Melissa would follow her father quietly to see if she can spot Charlie. So when she told her that she wanted to transition into a girl she was a hundred percent positive that Melissa would never talk to her again because she's a disgusting freak, but yet again Melissa surprised her and was actually emhappy/em for her! She even hugged her with joy that was the moment Charlotte knew she was irrecoverably in love with her best friend./p  
p class="MsoNormal"That dreadful morning when Melissa found out that she was the one terrorizing her little sister and her friends, when she was already in too deep to stop, she knew she was doing it to help cover up for Melissa burying Bethany Young, because she loved her and watched over her even when it broke her heart, even when Melissa was with Ian and Wren she still watched and then one day before Alison went missing, she couldn't take it anymore and came back, Melissa hasn't seen her since she became a girl, and she was afraid to tell her who she really was, so she made up a name Cece Drake, but as usual Melissa saw right through her, she instantly knew it was her./p  
p class="MsoNormal"They went to CapeMay together, she wanted to watch over her little sister, who at the time didn't even know that they were sisters, or cousins to be more accurate, her real reason though, was winning Melissa back, which wasn't that hard, the minute that Melissa knew who she was, she threw herself into her arms, like she finally got home after a long trip. So when they met again Melissa catching her red handed, she truly believed that Melissa would emhate /emher, she was so scared of the brunette's reaction her whole body was shaking. But Melissa understood where she was coming from, she was angry and disappointed but she never hated her, she embraced her that night, they had a long calm talk, instead of fighting and screaming like Charlotte was expecting, and it ended with Melissa helping her instead of leaving her, and in that moment Charlotte knew she would never leave the dark haired beauty ever again even if her life depended on it./p  
p class="MsoNormal"Melissa protected her and gave her all the financial support she needed to play the game, that's when they became inseparable, Charlotte confessed her love first, she kissed Melissa with all the love in her heart, and Melissa loved her back if not as equally intense. No one knew about their romantic relationship, no one knew they were in contact anymore even, that until Melissa told her mother Veronica about them when Charlotte reviled herself finally and got committed to Welby. Understandably her mother was not happy with it, but when she saw the amount of love they shared she gave them her blessing with one condition, Charlotte never goes near Spencer and her friends ever again or next time it'll be a prison cell instead of a hospital bed. Charlotte respected veronica, she was like mother she never had, stiff and practical, but so protective and loving./p  
p class="MsoNormal"When Melissa proposed to her Charlotte marked it as the best day in her entire life, she was on cloud nine ever since, and now Melissa was taking her to her sister's wedding wanting to show her off to everyone and go public despite what anyone thinks. Charlotte loved Melissa Hastings with every fiber of her soul, she never thought or believed that she deserves someone like Melissa, or that Melissa would even think of her, but here they are, and she feels like the luckiest girl in the whole entire universe, because she belongs to Melissa Hastings and Melissa Hastings belongs to her./p  
p class="MsoNormal"So she grabbed her lovers hand and rushed up the stairs to their rented bedroom, closing the door behind them forcefully, she pushed Melissa onto their bed and made love to her all night, she used to think 'making love' was just a sorry excuse adults use to romanticize sex, but being with Melissa in that moment nothing described what they were doing better that making love, because she loved her she wanted to show her how much and sex just wasn't the right word to describe that./p 


	3. Chapter 3

i'm so glad you guys are liking this fic, I honestly started it and posted it for pure fun, just to get rid of an idea that has been naging me, I never expected any feedback at all, so this is great, thank you all of you.

Chapter Text

His leg was bouncing anxiously, his heart was thumbing so fast in his chest he could feel the blood rushing through his veins, he had his head between his hands, his golden hair a curtain over his broad face trying to suppress the major headache he was experiencing while trying to ignore the cold sweat droplets running down his back and forehead.

Everything leading to this moment was for her. Everything that he ever did was for her. He knew that since they were little. From deliberately walking in on them with his sister when they were little just to see her, to what he did just three hours ago.

He wasn't a saint he knew that, he did some unspeakable shit throughout his life that he was anything but proud about, but every single one of those actions was for her. This one was no different. Except that it was, he didn't know how to get himself out of this one, albeit he didn't by any means regret what he did, if he was honest he wanted to do that the very first time he saw them together.

Because he loved her, so purely and irrecoverably he didn't know if he could ever go back from loving her that much. He didn't want to. He was scared though, not because what he did might get him in a lot, and I mean a lot of trouble, but because he was afraid that even after that she wouldn't choose him.

She never chose him, he was always her second choice. She was always his first. He didn't know if it was because she was manipulated at such a young age to love a predator or because she genuinely thought that choosing said man would fulfil her fairytale fantasy or because she had some weird fetch because of all her daddy issues or because she simply didn't like him that much or or or.

When she came to Africa with him he thought that he finally had it all, a great job, the love of his life, good money and amazing health, he was stable and healthy and happy, for the first time in forever he was finally happy, because she was there by his side, he read her book drafts she helped him with the shelters he built, they cooked dinner they laughed they made love they kissed each other good mornings and goodnights, they were so domestic his heart wanted to burst.

Until he asked her to go further away with him, and she said no, her excuse was that she needed to go back for the book release because she has another book to write after, but he knew, he heard her talking to her boss, it's not because of how well she would write that book, it's because of who she was going to write it with. And for the millionth time his heart broke because of her, it shattered to a thousand pieces, she didn't chose him, again.

He was struggling with his thoughts and emotions to the point where he craved a drink, straight vodka, he was sober for over seven years now, he fought every temptation thrown his way to this point, but what they just did, what he just did, threw him off completely, and the killer headache he was having didn't help at all.

Just a little sip he thought, just enough to calm me down nothing too crazy, just one little si-

His thoughts were cut short by the sound of the bathroom door swinging open, he looked up and his mouth went dry, he hated that she still had this effect on him, that the mere sight of her could both fix and break his heart at once, he hated how much he loved her and he hated how beautiful she looked, like a literal Disney princess, like God himself painted her.

She was dripping wet, her lean legs smooth and soft, a small towel covering her chest and torso leaving so little to the imagination, as she walked closer to him, his breathing got harder, he loved her so much it wasn't fair sometimes.

But when she finally stopped in front of him he noticed that she was crying, his throat tightened and his nostrils burned, he couldn't stand watching her cry, her never was.

The first time he saw her crying was burned into his memory like a bad film, he remembers everything, from the way he felt then to the smell of pine trees in his child home's back yard, it was summer vacation and his younger sister's friends were there, Ali ran off with Emily as usual, and the other two were whispering about some magazine in her room, it was one of the rare days in his teen years where he was actually sober.

He went out for some air when he heard faint sniffles near the large pine tree in their yard, and then he saw her, she was crying softly into her hands, those pretty delicate hands, his heart immediately ached for her.

When he had the courage to ask her if she was ok, the look on her face broke his heart into a million pieces for the first time ever, she looked so broken so vulnerable so hurt, he didn't know what to do with himself.

He later learned about her father's affair and he felt like he was just punched in the guts, because he knew how she felt exactly, it was that year he found out that he was actually Peter Hastings son, so it made her secret all the more painful.

Her secret.

She trusted him enough back then to share something so personal about her, and she trusted him enough now to do this with her, she trusted him, the thought alone made him smile a little despite what was going through his head.

Seeing her cry, now, after all those years, made him feel the exact same way he felt back then, heart aching for the beautiful angel in front of him, to the point where he wants to cry too.

What happened next took him by surprise, the shorter brunette stepped closer tentatively and hugged him, her petite frame colliding perfectly with his muscular one, and he held her close, his body instantly relaxing and breathed her in.

They stayed like that for what felt like hours, even though it was just a couple of minutes, she removed herself from the embrace gently and he immediately missed her warmth.

"No one could know" she murmured gently, moving to where her bag was to get dressed

"Aria..." he didn't want to keep it a secret, he needed to tell someone or he'll lose his mind, and he really didn't want to screw up seven years of sobriety with a huge bottle of straight vodka right now.

As if she was reading his mind she spoke up again, firmly this time "Jason, promise me, no one"

It took him a few seconds to answer, but he finally gave in "ok" he whispered, after all he could never say no to Aria Montgomery, he never was able to.

Aria knew what she was asking him to do was unfair, she never was fair per say to him, he would move earth and heaven for her if she asked him to, she knows, she always knew how much he loved her.

And she hated herself for playing with him like that, she usually thought that all that A drama she went through as a teenager was karma for how she treated Jason DiLaurentis.

The thing was, she loved him back, she really did, but she was fifteen when she met Ezra Fitz, Jason had never made a move on her before that or after for that, until she was seventeen that is, but Ezra did.

She was young, her brain way older that her age, she wanted a cool older boyfriend that was nothing like those stupide high school boys at her school, she was in love with the idea of Ezra.

Then he turned out to be her English teacher, and looking back at it now, she realized just how much manipulation he flung her way to guilt her into staying with him, all those times he pretended to feel bad about their situation or how wrong it looked but how right it felt, she fell for it back then and went after him even more, but now, now she sees how brilliant that scam was.

Ezra was always a charming man, handsome, ethical (ha), smart, educated, a sociopath. He knew just how to sweep her off her feet, and into his web of lies, she'd never forgive herself for not seeing that earlier, for being so blindly in love, for being played so easily when she considers herself a pretty bright person.

When she caught him writing that fucking book, she was so mad, not because he took advantage of her as much as because he did it right under her nose, but then he went and did it again and she can't believe how stupide she has been, all the signs were there after all.

The book, the cameras, the cheating on national TV, the constant blaming, the way he looked after he thought that Nicole died, he has never looked like that when she was at danger, ever, because he never truly loved her.

The man that actually did truly love her, was always right there, right in front of her, standing just a few feet behind her looking tired and broken, yet somehow so in love, with her.

And for that she would never forgive herself, for always choosing Ezra over him, for always running back to a man that never deserved her, a man that saw her as more of a possession than an equal partner, instead of the man who would love her so unconditionally it makes her want to cry.

And yet, she still wasn't ready to give him what he wanted from her, because she deeply believes that she doesn't deserve Jason, that she never will.

So she did the only thing she knew how when it came to him, she pulled him in, then pushed him away, and she felt terrible, she always hated Alison for doing the exact thing to Emily when they were younger, because she knew how much it hurt Emily, yet she was doing the exact thin to Alison's older brother.

And in that moment she felt for Ali, she understood how scary it is, to love someone that you don't deserve, and how letting them completely go would kill you, so you give them enough hope to stay, but not too much to become anything serious.

She wanted to apologize to Jason, she really did, she wanted to confess everything to him, how she feels, why she kept choosing Ezra, how she'd move heaven and earth for him too.

But she couldn't, because every time she looked at him, she remembered how awful she was to him, maybe not Ali to Emily awful but she defiantly broke his heart a couple times, she could see it in his eyes, the pain, the longing.

And it didn't really help, that he looked at her like that, like she was the most precious most treasurable human on earth, like she hung the moon, because she defiantly doesn't feel like it, she hates herself for hurting him so many times, she hates herself for being too much of a cowered to tell him what he deserves to hear from her.

Even the one time they actually became official, she made him keep it a secret because she didn't want to make Ezra too mad at her that she might lose her chance to get back together with him.

Ezra, why on earth was she so obsessed with him, how can someone be so blind, so naive, the few weeks she was officially with Jason were the happiest of her life, she felt so light so happy, she felt so young and free, why did she give all that up to be with Ezra.

What truly amazed her though, is how Jason still loved her, after everything, he still looked at her like she was the only girl in the world, like no one would ever compare.

Because to him, no one would, he never hated her for choosing Ezra because he knew that the manipulating scum screwed with her head since a very young age, to make her his, to own her, like she was a car or a lamp.

He never blamed her because he knew how scared she was to admit how she really felt, because of how fucked up her past was, he could feel how scared she was.

He wanted to kill everyone that has ever hurt her, starting with her excuse of a father, ending with Ezra Fitz.

And he did.


	4. Chapter 4

**_i'm so sorry for taking literary for ever to post this chapter, but i was super busy those past weeks, and life's gotta get ya._**

She stood at their bedroom's door frame, fondly watching her oblivious fiancé unpack their cloths, Alison has been the love of her entire life since she could remember, she loved the blond with a passion, no matter who or what she was doing, it was always the golden haired beauty that stuck in the back of her mind.

Every time Alison would push her away she would swear to never even think of her again, and if it was anyone else she would've been true to her word, she knows as much, but it's not anyone, it's Alison DiLaurentis, the girl she couldn't hate or bring herself to feel friendly towards no matter how hard she tried.

When the day finally came, the day Alison confessed that she was indeed in love with Emily, the brunette felt like she died and went to heaven, like she was in one cruel dream her mind put her in, that day still feels like a dream to her, Emily has to reassure herself almost every day that the woman in front of her is actually real, not just a fragment of her imagination.

She was broken out of her trance when Alison turned around, giving her fiancé a beautiful bright smile, her eyes shining like stars on a peaceful calm night, bright and absolutely gorgeous, those eyes that captured Emily's heart the very second she first saw them.

Her smile huge across her delicate face, pearly teeth showing the amount of happiness radiating off of her, off of the both of them.

Her beautiful dimples showing, making Emily's heart race a million seconds an hour, like the first time she ever laid eyes on her woman, back when she was only a thirteen year old little confused girl, crushing on her best friend.

She got to her, wrapping her long tan arms around the blonde's petite waist, her smile just as big and bright as Alison's, both their hearts were burning with unconditional love for one another.

God, she loved that woman so much, it was impossible for her to let her go, not now, not after she finally got her, not when she'd literally die if she ever lost her, because losing Alison is not like losing anyone else, even losing her own dad, the man she loved more than life itself, the man that's death got her so depressed she had to drop college, not even that compares to what would happen to her if she ever lost Alison.

"Hi" she whispered, her lips inches away from the shorter woman's own. "Hey" Alison whispered back, giggling softly, adorably, like a carefree child.

Emily closed the gap between them tasting her fiancé's lips, something she could never describe, something strictly Alison, like vanilla and roses, something she got addicted to, drunk on, the very first time she kissed her blond haired beauty at the kissing rock near the lake when they were just kids, something she never found in any other woman, no matter how hard she tried.

Their lips kept meeting again and again, like a wave meeting the shore, hungry yet sweet, passionate and slow, like fire and ice, like rock and roll and Kurt Cobain, a kiss that is theirs, that no one can copy or fake, a kiss that screams true love, a kiss written by the stars for Emily Fields and Alison DiLaurentis.

"So…" Alison smiled up at her fiancé's beautiful bronze face. "So?" Emily smiled warmly back at her, their faces still close to each other their breath mixing, their bodies tangled in a lazy hug.

"Where did you wander off to earlier?" she raised a perfectly sculpted eyebrow at the taller woman, daring her to lie. "Don't kill me" Emily started, untangling herself from the blond, her voice cautions "but I was trying to reach the court house to file a restraining order against your dad" she ended the sentence with two raised hands and a scrunched up face in mock surrender.

To her surprise though Alison was far from angry, instead she said "and? What did they say is it happening?" Emily smiled slightly in relief, walking back to embrace her wife to be. "no, but I did run into Toby, and he pretty much wants to do the same thing, he's talking to some of his friends back at the station and hopefully we'll have one against him by tomorrow"

Alison hummed approvingly and hugged her fiancé again burying her face in the crook of Emily's neck, she loved everything that was Emily from the way she looked to the way she made every single fiber in her body tingle with joy and love.

Alison never thought, not in a million years that the Emily Fields would be hers, or that she would be brave enough to accept her feelings for the bronze beauty, or that after everything she put her through and all the pain she made her feel, that Emily would still love her, not in her wildest dreams.

But here they are, engaged and completely head over heels in love, and most importantly they are happy, they are _so_ happy together, and Alison can't imagine herself with anyone else ever, to be honest she _never_ has, ever since she met Emily, even before she accepted and confessed her feelings to the brunette, she has never imagined herself with anyone else, she wanted them to go to Paris together since they were thirteen for God's sake.

She still wants them to go there together, she still wants to see the wind blowing Emily's hair, and she still wants them to walk down the French revere in their bikinis, dreams that she's so determined on making a reality with the love of her life, the girl that can make her a thousand times more happier and calmer with just a look.

She always felt her safest with Emily, near Emily, in Emily's arms, when she first lost their baby she felt like dying, like there was no reason to live anymore, and Alison is a _very_ strong woman, she went through two whole years living alone on the streets of Philly by herself and she came back without a scratch.

But losing a child is something no mother can bare, even if that child was made with and for all the wrong reasons, she was impregnated with Emily's eggs, forced against her will, and yet she grew to love that baby with all her heart, their baby.

Emily was the one then to get her out of it, to make her feel better, to give her the comfort and love she needed, since day one Emily was always there.

Even though that was her baby too, she pushed her own grief aside to help Alison through hers, and the blonde didn't think she could, but she loved her even more for that, so much more.

She never asked her anything that could make her sad or uncomfortable, like when Alison started telling people that she got an abortion, instead of the baby actually falling against her will in a bloody mess on the bathroom's floor in the middle of her fifth month of pregnancy, she knew that her wife to be wasn't ready to share, even though Alison could see the questions swirling behind her concerned beautiful chocolate brown eyes.

She was there by her side even when Kenneth accused her of being a demon child and that getting engaged to a woman is what made her too stupide and useless to get an abortion and make him miss his only chance of being a grandfather, even then, Emily was right there to tell her how beautiful of a human she was and that Kenneth never deserved to be her dad in the first place.

* * *

She just doesn't understand why her fiancé is doing all of this, all the secrets and lies, they both agreed to not have any secrets between them when they got together and up to the pregnancy accident they didn't and Emily was starting to really worry but she knows how hard it's been on Alison lately, the baby was one thing and them postponing their own wedding for two years in a _row_ is another.

The first time was when they lost the baby, and they were both too depressed to go through with any wedding plans, the second was when Emily herself got an amazing job offer with a hefty paycheck in NewYork for a whole year and Ali was still a teacher at rosewood high so they couldn't go together, hence the wedding being postponed, _again_.

She doesn't really mind the prolonged engagement though, she loves spending time with Alison no matter what they were labeled as, but she does know how important the wedding really is to her Alison, she needs to settle down she needs to be able to call Emily her wife, she needs the reassurance that Emily would never leave her, although Emily shares that fear with her, she still has that annoying little voice at the back of her head telling her that Alison would find a nice rich man and all of this would end up being practice, for the real thing, which is not her.

Years of emotional abuse would do that to a person, in their case, two people.

Emily broke their hug that seemed to go on for hours, even though it was a couple of minutes. "You know he can't hurt you, right?" she locked her eyes on Alison's bright blue ones, already drowning in them. "I won't let him, I won't let _anyone_ touch a single hair on your precious head Alison" she whispered with so much affirmation and conviction that made Alison's heart skip a beat.

" I know, I love you" Alison whispered back, leaning her head in and pressing her lips softly onto Emily's plump ones, she kissed her with so much desperation like she was afraid that the second they stopped Emily would vanish into thin air.

Sliding her tongue gently onto Emily's lower lip, silently asking for an entrance, that she was granted immediately, Emily could never deny her anything, she never was able to.

Pulling the taller women closer to her body roughly, wanting to meld into one soul, wanting to be as close to the love of her life as their stupid physical bodies would let them, Emily sighed kissing the blonde just as desperately, it's moments like these that any insecurities Emily has about the blonde truly loving her disappears, because no one kisses anyone like that unless they are so irrecoverably in love with them, and Emily can _feel_ how much Alison loves her when she kisses her like that, she can feel all of her fiancé's feelings pour like a running water tub into her soul.

And she wants to make Alison feel just how much she loves her too, and that's beyond any words, numbers or any humanly possible scales, she loves Alison so much it used to physically hurt her when they were younger, it _still_ physically hurts, twelve years later, twelve years of being head over heels, so fucking in love with Alison DiLaurentis and she'll never stop, she doesn't think she can, even if she wanted to, because no matter how hard she tried, and she tried, her heart belonged to the beautiful blonde since the very first day she ever laid eyes on her.

Sometimes she could swear that Alison has a magic spell on her, because she has _never_ felt the way she feels with Alison, with anyone else, not Maya not Paige not Talia, no one, no one at all.

And if Alison was being honest with herself, no man, or woman she has ever been with had made her heart ache and break and swell as much as Emily Fields, because no one looked at her the way Emily did, no one touched her the way Emily does, and no one, no one at all, loved her as much as Emily loves her.

Every time she looks at the beautiful brunette she silently thanks every high power there is for giving her such an amazing human she can call hers, such a wonderful woman she can spend the rest of her life with.

And with those thoughts in mind, both women felt too overwhelmed with love to one another, that's when Emily pulled Alison gently back to their hotel room bed, they knew it wasn't lust, as much as it was love, Emily wanted to show her how much she loved her without using words, and Alison was more than happy to comply.

As clothes were thrown, soft whimpers and moans were heard, heavy pants and quit words of love were whispered into the warmth of the small room, no one saw the invading jealous eyes spying on them from the small open crack at the door.

No one noticed, not until it was way too late.


	5. Chapter 5

_**since i'm an ass and took way too long to give y'all something, here's a double upload.**_

A hand gripping the armchair next to her as the other one laid lazily on top of her stomach, her head tilted slightly to the side with a soft smile on her face as she watched her husband laugh genuinely for the first time in months.

Caleb had one arm on Toby's knee the other wiping away his own tears from all the laughing he's done, Toby's friend from work, a tall buff bald dark guy, was talking about how he convinced a criminal once that he was The Rock's cousin, he was hilarious, Hanna thought looking between the three men sat in front of her in the church's lobby where the bar was just a few steps behind them.

It was nice, seeing him happy like that, ever since she gave birth to their second child, Caleb has been distant, he loved his kids so much and he gave them all his time never complaining once, but he wasn't the same shaggy fierce boy she fell in love with any more, he was cold and far and when it was only the two of them, he seemed miserable, he stopped talking to her about most things, and soon she gave up on asking, their marriage has become dull, unhappy and the only thing they had in common anymore was the routine.

It was killing her, because she loved him so much, she has never felt that much love for anyone in her life ever like she loved Caleb Rivers, but they were at a point where love wasn't enough anymore, they desperately needed a change, so when Spencer sent them her wedding invitation, it was a perfect opportunity for them to be alone a whole weekend without work, kids or distractions, Hanna was hoping they could at least talk about their relationship, but since they arrived they never got a chance to be alone, and it was starting to annoy the blonde.

One of the many reasons her marriage was failing was her job, again, her business was raising rapidly, she had her own clothing line, which was expanding all over the world like fire, she had a new line in hand bags, shoes and just recently, perfumes, her bank account was barfing money, and with that her responsibilities rose as well, she was out of the country every two days for meetings, photo shoots, brand deals and much more, and saying that Caleb wasn't happy with that was an understatement.

He was supportive as ever at the beginning, he even used to take some days off of work to go pay her surprise visits or come along to some of her shoots, but then they had Iris, and he didn't want his daughter to be raised by nannies, he wanted her mother to be there for her, but of course that wasn't possible, then they had baby Rob and Caleb lost it, her work was her first priority, it was so important to her she couldn't just throw everything away to be a stay at home mother, and Caleb didn't understand that, he had a normal office job with limited hours every day, no wonder he didn't understand.

She really doesn't know when it went wrong with them exactly, she knows they pulled away from each other at some point, and she wasn't blaming Caleb for all of it either, she wasn't trying to fix it, she has pulled away too, they both did.

And deep down she knew that separation is what they needed in order to be happy again, but that thought scared her shitless, it scared her to imagine her life without him, it scared her to imagine living alone with a shared custody of the kids only to be in each other's lives like that, it scared her that if the kids never existed that nothing would've forced them to know each other anymore, it was all oh so terrifying so she pushed it away, she pushed those thoughts deep down and hoped with all her will that this weekend would fix everything.

Just as Hanna was about to engage in the conversation Caleb got up and out probably heading back to their shared bedroom, following him quickly she bumped into an annoyed Aria followed closely by Jason Dilaurentis..? What was he doing with Aria following her that closely? Hanna noticed they were probably arguing on the way in, filing that information for later, she will defiantly grill Aria for this, but for now she needs to talk to her pissy husband.

The second they reached their bedroom's door Hanna couldn't hold it in anymore, she started talking so fast getting everything out all at once, just like the night she got shit drunk on Arias bachelorette party and immediately threw it all up not even an hour later, like she was scared that if she stopped for breath that Caleb might disappear.

"Caleb! We need to talk and you can't shut me out or cut me off or say that you're tired or busy because I know you're not, so get in there and sit and listen to what I have to say, all of it till the very end or I swear to all my holey Prada's that ill scream so loud you won't be able to explain it to anyone" she was practically screaming her words at him her hands flying wildly around her "you changed on me Caleb! You're not the same boy I fell for anymore and I know I'm not the same girl you fell for ether, but I need you Caleb! I need _my_ Caleb. You're miserable and so am I, we broke up before _because_ of this and you're still doing it! You still want me to abandon my job, to give you my full undivided attention Caleb, why? Why are you always, that selfish why can't we just be supportive of each other, be ok together why are you throwing this marriage out the window? please!"

Just as she took in her breath and was about to continue her rant Caleb cut her off with his own yelling, which rapidly became an intense screaming match that almost everyone at church heard.

"Oh that's rich coming from you Hanna! You gave up on me, on us and our kids, or did you forget them too, huh? I was always and always will be supportive of you, and so fucking proud of you but not like that, not we come last, not even second, it's like you married your job and fame not me, I don't want ALL your attention Hanna I want some of it I'm not even getting that! The kids don't even know you for God's sake, my mother that actually literally abandoned me as a child knows me more than you do these days, and your mother is there for me and the kids way more than you've ever been since they were born! Do you see what it's come to Hanna? Just how toxic and fucked up our lives has become, and it's all us this time, as sick as it is, I actually wish it was A whose fucking with our marriage lately so I wouldn't have to blame you, so I wouldn't have to hate you"

He ended his rant with a sad soft whisper that actually broke Hanna's heart way more than everything he just screamed at her.

" you hate me?" she croaked back, a broken whisper shattering her from the inside out as she thought about Caleb, the love of her entire life, the man that was such a huge part of her life she'd actually be lost without him, the father of her children, hating her, she couldn't bare it.

He just stared at her, hurt obvious on his face, his eyes hard and pained, his face red with anger, regret and a bunch of other intense emotions, his mouth opening and closing a couple times like he was about to say something before he squeezed his eyes shut pressing the heels of his palms to his temples, he looked like her was on the verge of crying, like he was this close to break down completely.

Hanna watched him in complete silence, hot tears streaming down her face, pulling he mascara aggressively down with them, staining her pale cheeks with expensive carbon black polymers, creating an angry jet black ragged line on her rather pretty face.

She watched him as he took a deep breath before walking past her and out of the room, without answering her question, without even giving her a second glance, like she was way too hideous to look at.

And that's exactly how she felt right then, she felt hideous, she felt disgusting, she hated herself for letting him hate her.

She hated herself for a lot of reasons, she always had issues with herself since she was thirteen, since she was brutally abandoned by her own father, since Alison made her feel like shit about her weight and looks, since her step sister turned out to be the actual devil and yet her dad loved dear bitch Kate more than he ever loved her, but mostly now, she hated herself in this moment the most.

Because Caleb has never hated her, ever in all their years together.

And now he does, she pushed him this far, and she hates herself for it so much.

Hates herself.

Hates what she's done.

Hates this weekend.

Hates her job.

Hates Caleb's mother, that scheming little snake.

Hates all the circumstances that got them to this point.

But mostly, Hanna Marin hated her own damn self.


End file.
